When Accommodations Fall Short: The Loud and Elusive Quiet Room

The Quiet Room at Vogue Knitting Live.

“A Quiet Room is a space that an attendee can retreat to safely whenever they feel overwhelm or overload from the event environment. It gives them time and space to decompress and regulate their sensory system, and balance their nervous system.” From: Eventwell, The Benefits of Quiet Rooms for Autism.

A large number of fiber artists are neurodivergent. This is partially because the nature of the crafts are conducive to the neurodivergent brain. Crochet and knitting are common stims for Autistic and ADHD people because it is a socially acceptable repetitive movement. It is shocking to me that most fiber-related events lack basic accommodations for neurodivergent crafters. As a result, most neurodivergent people do not attend fiber festivals or conventions, which is extremely sad since many Autistic’s special interest is in the fiber arts field. The main mission behind NeuroStitches is to foster community for neurodivergent individuals through fiber arts. While NeuroStitches has its own online space where we chat and meet, I want fiber-related events to be more inclusive so more neurodivergent people can attend and participate.

Last month, for the first time, I attended Vogue Knitting Live (VKL). VKL is basically a huge knitting and crochet conference where you can purchase yarn and accessories from a large marketplace, attend fashion shows, lectures, classes, and community meet ups. Before attending VKL, I learned they offered a Quiet Room, and was so excited because this would allow me to participate more. Accommodations, like the Quiet Room, are vital because they allow people like me to attend the event and participate. I previously wrote about my experience attending the New York Sheep and Wool Festival (“Rhinebeck”) where I had to leave early and miss events. If Rhinebeck offered a quiet space or any accommodations for neurodivergent people, I likely would’ve been able to stay and participate more.

I am enormously thankful to VKL for having a Quiet Room and I hope other fiber-related events follow. It truly is a positive step, and I commend them for their efforts. However, the issues I experienced with the Quiet Room indicate VKL must improve their DEI efforts and priorities. Here, I detail the problems I experienced with the Quiet Room and provide suggestions as to how VKL, and others in the fiber arts industry, can improve.

Knitting in the Quiet Room

I couldn’t find the Quiet Room.

Before I did anything else, I knew I must find the location of the Quiet Room so I would know a safe space to bolt to in case I became overwhelmed or overstimulated (this was a lesson I learned after attending Rhinebeck). After checking the website multiple times, walking each floor looking for a sign, and asking three volunteers, I finally found the Quiet Room on Saturday. VKL has a webpage under “Show Details” called “Disabled Services.” This page is how I learned that VKL has a Quiet Room. During the event, the webpage stated the Quiet Room’s location with the floor and classroom name. Unfortunately, I found out this information was incorrect after I walked into the room and interrupted a class in session. I’m happy to report that I did not in fact melt into a puddle even though I have had nightmares of this exact scenario.  

Then, I alternated between asking volunteers and just walking all the floors looking for a sign that would indicate where the Quiet Room was. I did not find one. None of the volunteers knew the location, or if they did give me the location, it was incorrect. When three volunteers cannot provide the correct location, that indicates a lack of instruction from event organizers. Additionally, most attendees didn’t know there even was a Quiet Room until I told them about it.

Once I found the Quiet Room on Saturday, there was no sign indicating that the room was the Quiet Room. On Sunday, there was a sign indicating the Quiet Room; however, there were two problems. First, you cannot see the sign from the main floor. You would have to know to walk down a hallway first, then you would see it. Given that the info on the website was incorrect, you wouldn’t even know that you needed to walk down that hallway to look for a sign. Second, the sign was used to prop open the door to the Quiet Room, resulting in a very loud Quiet Room.

The Quiet Room Entrance

The Quiet Room did have a sign up on Sunday, however, it was propping the door open, resulting in a loud Quiet Room.

The information on the Disabled Services webpage should be accurate. Volunteers and attendees should be well-informed that the Quiet Room even exists, but also where to find it. There should accurate maps and visual signs to indicate the location of the Quiet Room. The signs should be visible from the main floor area and not used to prop open the door. It is vital that Autistic people be able to find the Quiet Room quickly. I have a tendency to “bolt” when things get overwhelming so knowing where the Quiet Room is ahead of time is crucial.

The Quiet Room was loud.

At events like this, I don’t expect to have a completely silent space. The point of the Quiet Room is to dim sensory experiences. This is particularly challenging when the door is propped open, and all the chatter of the marketplace overwhelms the Quiet Room. I asked a volunteer if I could move the sign so I could close the door to the Quiet Room. She helped me move the sign and acknowledged that it probably was loud with the door propped open. Additionally, the Quiet Room seemed to be located next door to a kitchen as you could hear carts and clanging dishes distinctly.

The Quiet Room was not as advertised.

Before I went to VKL, I was so excited that they had a Quiet Room. I felt included, and like people were actually considering me. I was really disappointed that reality did not match what was promised. Most Autistics do not enjoy surprises. It is incredibly important for Autistic people to know what to expect. That’s why it is incredibly crucial that the promise matches reality.

The VKL website promised “noise canceling headphones and other resources” would be available in the Quiet Room during the Marketplace hours. However, there was no noise canceling headphones. The “other resources” consisted of ear plugs packaged in noisy plastic wrapping, water, tables and chairs, and a white noise machine.

Once I arrived in the Quiet Room, I was struck with sadness because I realized that the event had the resources to do the Quiet Room right but those resources were used for advertising and sponsorship.

Throughout the event there were these little nooks outfitted with large area rugs, comfy seating, couches, and lamps called the “knitCompanion Lounge.” The knitcompanion Lounges were located in extremely noisy areas. When I first arrived at VKL, I was excited when I saw these areas, thinking that if they have those in a noisy location, surely the Quiet Room has the same setup.

However, I was completely wrong. The knitCompanion Lounges were cozy with soft seating and lamps. The Quiet Room had the same uncomfortable chairs and tables as the rest of the conference and only had the big, overhead lights on.

The knitCompanion Lounge complete with comfy seating, area rug, coffee table, and cozy lamps.

Photo Credit: knitCompanion’s Instagram post retrieved 2/3/2025.

I understand that the point of creating spaces like the knitCompanion Lounges is to foster community at these events. I’m not advocating that they are reduced or taken away, but the Quiet Room should have these same resources. A lot of times when people complain about making spaces accessible, the usual, defensive answer is “we don’t have the resources.” Here, that is untrue as VKL states on their Sponsor webpage that VKL will provide the “Relax and Unwind Lounge Sponsor” with couches, lights, coffee table, and area rug.

The Quiet Room at Vogue Knitting Live 2025

The information on the website should be accurate. If you are stating that noise-cancelling headphones will be available, they should be available. If you can’t make an accommodation work, then don’t advertise that people can rely on their availability. The same comfy seating and lamps from the “Relax and Unwind Lounge” should also be present in the Quiet Room. Neurodivergent people notoriously hate “the big light.” The point of a Quiet Room is to take a sensory break, this includes dim lights.

Additionally, if you’re going to offer earplugs in noisy plastic wrapping, make them available outside the Quiet Room for people to open before entering. The Quiet Room should be available for at least an hour before and the hour after the marketplace opens and closes. I need to prep and decompress for events like VKL that is why it’s important that Autistic people be able to wait in the Quiet Room before the marketplace opens.    

There are no Autistics on Vogue Knitting’s Diversity Advisory Council (DAC).

The Quiet Room is a space available to everyone. It’s not like I have to show my Autism card to get in. However, Autistic people are going to use it the most. It is important when creating inclusive spaces to consult the ones who will use the accommodations.

After attending the VKL DAC Panel Discussion, I wanted to chat with some committee members about the issues with the Quiet Room and to ask about applying to be on the DAC. I summoned all my courage and I explained that I’d like to email them about these two topics because I’m more articulate over email. After speaking with two of the members, I learned that no one on the DAC is Autistic and, regarding applications, they aren’t looking to change things up. To be clear, I was not advocating that anyone be removed from the DAC or replaced, rather, I just wanted to see an Autistic person represented.

Now, more than ever, it is important for companies and organizations to improve their DEI efforts and follow through on promises. The Quiet Room problem was not the only indicator of VKL’s priorities regarding DEI. The Craftivism Panel on Fiber Arts Nonprofits was changed last minute after we were informed the host was unable to make it. There were posters advertising a new program, the “Business Accelerator” that “prioritizes” and is “primarily aimed at BIPOC and LGBTQIA+ small business owners.” The DAC Panel Discussion consisted of discussing their accomplishments.

There should be more disabled people on the DAC and, at the very least, please consult an Autistic person when planning the Quiet Room. Knitting and crochet have endured as a hobby because it is easily accessible. A large portion of stitchers are disabled and a diversity panel or council should accurately reflect that. The lack of disabled representation on the DAC is even more astonishing with the priority of the Business Accelerator program. While it does not explicitly exclude disabled small business owners, it is emphasized (twice) that other marginalized groups are prioritized over disabled small business owners. This kind of exclusion is extremely troubling and I hope the DAC changes the priorities of this program to be truly diverse and inclusive.

I want to thank VKL for the Quiet Room and for taking the first step in creating a more inclusive environment. However, the issues with the Quiet Room suggest opportunities for improvement and better representation. When companies and organizations promise diversity and inclusion they should deliver.